Follow these five rules and you'll enjoy a richer and more fulfilling date experience.
When it comes to your dating love life, do you wish there was a rulebook? While The Rules are so last century, a new dating handbook has yet to be created in the new era.
So how do you know the dos and don'ts rules of Dating? The truth is there are no hard and fast rules, but the following guidelines should help you navigate the dating world.
Rule #1: Listen to Your Heart.
Whether you're on a date, communicating with someone you meet online, or flirting with a cutie you meet in the flesh, it's important to pay attention and listen carefully to your gut. If a potential date's actions or words set off an internal alarm system, you owe it to yourself to pay attention and act accordingly. These alarms can be both good and sometimes bad. For example, if you've met someone online and they seem interesting, then you talk to them on the phone and they sound completely different (in a negative way), you may decide never to meet them in person. A positive example would be if you were on a date with someone and they seemed a little nervous but well intentioned, your gut might tell you to give them a second chance. By going on a second date, you'll gain a better understanding of whom they really are and if you'd like to see them soon.
Rule #2: Pay Attention to the Red Flags.
Like those internal alarms that alert you to your gut feelings, you also have an alarm system to alert you to the red flags. Often this alarm system is turned way down. As a result, we often ignore red flags and find ourselves getting involved with inappropriate partners because we're not paying close attention. To become a truly successful single in the new millennium, you owe it to yourself to become a red flag observer. That means paying attention to red flags as they are presented to you on your dates. An example of a red flag would be if you found yourself on a date with someone who could not stop talking about their ex spouse. They may be a fantastic person, and eventually make a great partner, but right now they're still not ready. Your job is to pay attention to that red flag and not pursue this person.
Rule #3: Actions Speak Louder Than Your Words.
During the course of your dating life you will most likely find yourself on a date with someone whose actions speak much louder than their words. Maybe they're attentive and chivalrous to you, but treat the waiter, bartender, and/or valet very poorly. Or maybe they claim they're ready for a long-term relationship, but their wandering eye soon tells you otherwise. To get the very most out of your dating life, it's important to understand that actions speak louder than words. When someone's actions are contrary to his or her words, this is not only a huge red flag, it's gut-check time. By paying attention and screening out potential partners whose actions don't match their words, you cut down on wasted dating time and make it that much easier to attract potential partners worth your valuable time and energy.
Rule #4: Don't Play Dating Games.
Successful singles know what goes around will come around. They also know the importance of being honest and well intentioned with the people they will date. As a successful single, you owe it to yourself and the individuals you date not to play old games. Try to call when you say you're going to call. Do what you say you're going to do, and be honest when the other person asks you if you'd like to go out again. If you don't want to see them again, say so in a kind and considerate manner. By being honest and letting them down easy, you avoid playing dating games. Expect the same honesty in return. If you don't really get it, don't play games by taking that out on the next person you date.
Rule #5: Know When to Say "Game Over."
Just as you should not play dating games, you will want to also avoid getting played. Like it or not, there are plenty of those players on the dating scene. It's up to you to know the signs of the player, know their game, and be confident enough to tell them "game over." Here's how to actually spot a player: When they approach, they'll take you a little off guard with a backhanded compliment/insult along the lines of "you're too cute to be wearing that" or "I'd buy you a drink, but you probably wouldn't talk to me." These tactics are known as The Dating Game. The player's real motive is to take you off guard so that you're on the defensive and try to make up for it by engaging in their game. The problem is, these players aren't really genuine. Instead of falling for their tactics, simply smile, say "game over," and walk (better yet, run!) away as fast as you can.
While there are no hard and fast dating rules, there are definitely some guidelines to follow to make your dating life more enjoyable. By really listening to your gut, paying attention to red flags, and understanding that actions speak louder than words, you cut down on wasted dating time. In doing so, you not only avoid getting played, but you also greatly increase your chances of dating relationship happiness.
沒有留言:
張貼留言